In her piece entitled “Who is to blame for all this pain?”—after the first line of my mammoth love letter to her of March 8, 1989—Lauren writes: “For all his bullshit and contradictions, Ranko, my beloved husband, was the most wonderful lover.” The past tense is a tad confusing here, but she was comparing me to her last two lovers, Craig and Mark, both yoga instructors from Los Angeles and both of recent vintage. By sheer coincidence, Lesley sent me a similar message on the very same day Lauren’s piece was written, September 14: “You are the best lover I have ever had.” She added plaintively: “You should be fucking me much more often.” An uplifting coincidence.