When the subject of health care in Croatia comes up in conversation, and especially with foreigners, I am liable to blurt out that I do not intend to ever come in contact with it. If I get hit by a truck, and if I am still conscious afterwards, I will demand to be taken to a hospital in Slovenia. My British passport will do wonders over there, I assume. On the whole, hospitals in Pula and Rijeka, the closest to Motovun in Croatia, are the pits. Barring freak accidents, which are perforce impossible to avoid, the best policy is not to get ill. Ever. I utter these words with such conviction that the people I am talking to usually fall silent. After a brief pause, they change the subject.